Friday 31 May 2013

Kid free guilt?!

Me and the Hubs have been together 7 years.
Have 3 girls, the oldest being 6 in two weeks time....and tomorrow we will be kid free for the first time in those 6 years.. Overnight.

I have booked a hotel for the bloke's birthday and we plan to do a bit of shopping etc.

So why before I have even left do I feel so guilty?!

The older two girls have stayed out overnight twice, But my little dot C has never been away from me for more then a couple of hours and only twice!
She is very much a mummy's girl, she is my shadow.
She has eyes for nobody else but me bless her, maybe it's due to our breastfeeding bond, which was longer then the other two girls.
Who knows?
But we are very close, we spend our day's reading, rolling balls, playing babies and doing the housework together, the rest of the time we just snuggle.
I must confess recently on school days we have have even shared a little siesta on the sofa together cuddled up.

I know she is more then happy to play at nanny and granddad's house, I just worry.
Will she think I have left her?
Jeez when did I become so lame!

I will probably end up spending most of my 'child free' time on the phone to them or spending the money I have put aside for me on them....

Oh well!

The mother in law has already asked me not to come home pregnant....what is she thinking?!
Clearly by 8pm he will be snoring and I will be on the phone to mother in law, asking a bazillion questions and making her pinkie promise my child(ren) have not had mental breakdowns without me.

ha! Being a mum eh?!

Monday 27 May 2013

Weigh in week 1 results!




Well I was pretty confident I had lost a bit of weight this week as I have tried really hard :)
Had a bit of a naughty day yesterday as we had a family day at the beach, which we all know is packed with yummy naughty's.
But was hoping if I didn't eat big portions and I walked a lot it would burn itself off somehow.
I didn't really eat lettuce (rabbit food) all week, I just cut out eating in the evenings and sugary drinks.
I didn't do any exercise as have been in all week with poorly children.

I lost a lush 5lbs!

So chuffed with that, am very focused.
Taking the dog for a massive walk today, and going to take our lunch with us.

How is everybody else doing if on diets?

First 5lbs off, lots more to go (drop in a ocean comes to mind)
But I will plod on!


Thursday 23 May 2013

Day 4 Of Diet!

Well I am on day four of my diet, and I have made a few changes already so thought I would quickly post them up.

1: I Can not live on smoothies.
I just have not had a spare minute at the moment, and ran out of fruit very quickly, I could not get to the shops due to two poorly children.

2: I have not been eating off a child's plate like I planned.

But I have stuck to three meals a day, and no sugary drinks/caffeine.
I have cut added salt out of my diet ( I usually put salt on everything I eat!)
No take outs or meal outs.
Honestly I don't feel like I am really on a diet yet.

I am looking forward to Monday (weigh day) because I already feel like I am less bloated making me feel like a size 10 already! ( a girl can dream) so I am hoping to off lost my first 2 lbs or so :)

Is anybody else dieting, or lost a decent amount?
What do you do that works for you?

I just want to feel comfortable going out, I want to chase my girlies around and not feel like im being stared at for it, I want to be able to go on fairground rides and I want to start horse riding.

My weight is stopping me doing any of the above.
So bring it on!

To be perfect I think I have about 8-9 stone to loose!
But I don't want 'perfect', as apparently 8stone 3 is my ideal weight for my height! (Screw that and all!)

Before children I was a happy size 10 and I was exactly 10 stone, this girl isn't made to be 8 STONE.

I would be happy to loose 4stone I think :)

But small steps at a time eh!

Wednesday 22 May 2013

Wednesday Words..For Emma...

This is the first time I am taking part in Wednesday words.

It is a very important day, For it is the day my friend starts her radiotherapy.
At first, I thought maybe it isn't my place, to say anything, leave that for her close family and closer friends.
But Emma is my friend.
I don't have many. (Emma does!)
And even though we don't see each other very often, I know Emma is always there for me.
She has always made that clear, and has gone out of her way many times for me.
 She even drove my cat to the vet..which saved her life.
That is why Emma has many, friends in 'real life' and through her blogging, because she is there for everybody.
She is an amazing friend!
Emma blogs over at http://www.crazywithtwins.com/
Her twitter account is @crazywithtwins 

So brave lady here are some words I have found for you.


You may see me struggle
but you won't see me fall.
Regardless if I'm weak or not I'm going to stand tall.

I just felt these words fit right now, Emma will never let anything stop her.
Ever.






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What i feed my children..

I always like to read about other people's daily life's, especially if there are children involved.
I think we all like knowing what other people get up to, hence shows like big brother being huge hits.

So I thought I would just show you my meal planner for next week for my children.
Obviously one of my children has Type 1 Diabetes, so she is on a calculated diet, and I have to buy in several options.
Also 'C' has a very fast metabolism, and suffers with low blood sugars, so she is on a 2 hourly diet. Extra calories.

So I have one daughter on a low sugar diet (most of the time).
Another daughter on a higher sugar diet.
And another who goes between both bless her!

In our house we have, Breakfast, Snack, Lunch/pudding, Snack, Dinner/pudding, Supper..(also 'O' sometimes has snacks in the middle of the night depending on her blood sugars.

So for Breakfast I like to have a few options in, I love to give my children choice, I think its very important.

So next week on our Breakfast menu's we have:

Toast
Weetabix
Porridge
Croissants
Fruit
Yogurts
Pure juices.

I generally give them the choice of these every day, on weekends ill cook them a mini fry up.
Sometimes they just choose 1 item, sometimes they have 1 of everything.
I lay it on the table and tell them to help themselves.
Secretly keeping and eye on what 'O' eats so I can calculate her insulin needs.

For their lunches, (which I personally find harder) i make 3 lunch boxes every day.
I have a blog about our healthy lunch boxes further down my page :)

On my list for next week we have:

Bagal's
Ham salad sandwiches
Pasta salad box
Cheese and salad wraps
Make their own pitta's.

I then add 4 more items( or let them choose)

A drink
a piece of fruit
something to dip(breadsticks, salad sticks, veg sticks etc.
and a cereal bar.

For their dinner's:

Chicken korma, with pasta, sweetcorn and pea's.
Lasagne with broccoli, and crusty rolls.
Beef stew with crusty bread.
Breadcrumbed pork chops, with mash potato, Cabbage gravy.
Minted lamb chop roast dinner.

Puddings:

Banana and custard,
icecream
mixed fruit
Yogurts
Tinned fruit and cream.

I hope this has gave someone some new idea's.
I am always looking for new fresh idea's so if you have any leave a comment!
Thanks for reading!



Tuesday 21 May 2013

Some recent pictures...Look how big my girls have got!

                                                    'S' is 6 next month. 'O' is 4 and a half.




'C' is now 21 months old!

Monday 20 May 2013

So my diet started (Again) today!!!

Day 1 of my new diet has started!
I have decided I get bored easily... and so I have a game plan to keep it fresh.
So I will be taking it a week at a time, changing things up a bit as I go.
This week I am going in hardcore (GULP!)

Breakfast= Fruit smoothie

Lunch= Fruit smoothie

Dinner= Normal home cooked meal but on a child's portion plate.

That will be it! I am sure I will probably have tears before my 7 days is up, writhing on the sofa for carby goodness... but I am going to do this!

My starting weight is a horrid 16stone11Llbs (Would not even tell my partner this!)

I hope I get some followers along the way to keep me sane as god knows ill need the help!

Saturday 18 May 2013

Will My Family Ever Understand Diabetes?!

Today as I type, I am feeling hurt yet again by my family's lack of understanding when it comes to Type 1 Diabetes.  

My nephew has been sick a handful of times over the last couple of days and his birthday party is supposed to be tomorrow.
I texted my sister assuming the party was off...apparently not.
I then politely pointed out It would be less then 48 hours after he was last ill, and that I couldn't risk it with 'O'.
Now I am being told yet again that I am being 'dramatic' and 'over the top'.
What upsets me is I have told her all the risks.
She knows how dangerous a simple bug is for somebody with Diabetes.

If 'O' gets a sickness bug, her body gets very stressed and can cause very erratic and high blood sugars.
If she is not eating, she can get very low blood sugars.
If she is being sick she will get dehydrated very fast, and its not as simple as small sips every 5 minutes like with my other children.
It means constant finger pricks to monitor her blood sugars, it means working out constantly how much or little insulin she needs.
It means testing her urine for keytones and trying to get rid of them with the right amount of insulin and fluids..... not an easy task when your child is being sick constantly and refuses fluids!
It means trying to guess what her body is going to do next...and hoping for the best.

I don't like to see any of my children ill.
It is never and easy thing for any parent, but try doing everything above, while cleaning up sick, comforting your child, riffling through the medicine cupboard for the sugar free drugs, while on the phone to the hospital warning them to keep a bed open for her on the ward with a screaming toddler on your hip, and a 5 year old complaining of a sore tummy.

Another thing I struggle with on 'sick days' is having to choose between my children.
And if we are admitted on to the childrens ward... I have to leave my other children at home... this is always a hard thing for me to do.
It breaks my heart everytime.

Why as a mother can she not understand that.
Its not about Diabetes, its about common sense.
My non diabetic children wont be attending the party either!


Friday 17 May 2013

Feeling a bit Hmph...

Having a bit a of a dramatic day today..

While walking home from the school run this morning, I found my best friend in floods of tears... (totally expected an unplanned pregnancy!) But I was faced with a different kind of bombshell...

She has been texting her partner's friend...it went to far and he had took her phone from her as he knew she was up to no good.
I invited her in and calmed her down with a cuppa.
Weeks ago I noticed she was constantly on her phone, I asked why and she told me who she was texting but told me it was innocent enough.
I told her it needed to stop, that somebody was going to get hurt and the next day she promised me it had stopped...and then this!
After calming her down I sent her home and told her she needs to tell him the truth, and give him time to decide what he wants to do, so she left.

The thing is now I have had time to think I feel really bad.

Should I of told her partner weeks ago? He actually asked her if she was having an affair with...me!
Because she was on her phone so much,  every time he asked who it was she said me!
Cant blame him really but do people think that little of me to begin with?
I am a very loyal person and would never cheat on my partner, We are very much in love and best friends!

Does my best friend not think much of me if she lied to my face, she promised me it was done with!

She says it started innocently, do I believe her now, now that I know what she is capable of?

She also says she is bored, her partner is never home, and she liked the attention, Does that make it ok?!

No matter what this man chooses now, whether to end things, or work it out is their business, I just feel so sorry for him, as he works with his 'friend' on a daily basis!

I cant shake this 'icky' feeling.

Have I been a bad person?
A bad friend?

Roll on 6pm when I can have a cuddle with my partner!

Opinions?

Thursday 16 May 2013

Schools....what are they teaching our children these days?!

So I am  walking 'S' to school this morning, Plodding along...
'S' pipes up with 'oh no!
I forgot my skipping rope!'
I carry on walking while rolling my eyes( she has forgot the darn thing every day this week!)
Typical morning right?
Wrong!
So the next snippet of our conversation went like this...

Me:' Don't worry 'S' you can just play another game'
'S':  'Like what?'
Me: ' I don't know, why don't you play hopscotch?
'S': 'Whats hopscotch?'
WHATS HOPSCOTCH!!!!
How does my near 6 year old not know what hopscotch is?!
Am I supposed to of taught this before school start?
 Am I the worst parent in the world?!
I am sure  hopscotch is like day 1 teaching of school...it damn well should be.

Me: 'ok...how about 'where Is the time Mr wolf?'
'S': huh? don't know it mummy.
Me: sting ball? Kiss chase? cops and robbers?
'S': We don't play any of those games, we don't know them.
Me: *STUNNED* 'Well what do you play?'
'S' 'skipping ropes :)'

Ignoring her utter cuteness for a second....

How do kids not know these games?!
By the time we got to the playground I wanted to snatch every damn skipping rope, and scooter, and bike, and give children 'proper' toys like chalk and conkers and a tennis ball to bruise each other with!

I guarantee by Monday my daughter will be going to school and teaching all her friends all of these games...that's my weekend sorted eh!

What games did you used to play at school?

Wednesday 15 May 2013

Respect Your Elder's?!

So another rant.. yes I'm clearly in one of those mood's this week!

I was always brought up to respect anybody older then me, for back chatting, cheekiness etc.
Well at a young age I just thought,  oh ok... and got on with my day, It wasn't until I had my own children I realised that respecting your elder's is not an easy task!

I have always been a friendly well mannered person ( I think) but since having my first daughter I have learned that sometimes you need to voice your opinion and stick up for yourself.

I have realised that the older generation have very little respect for anyone else apart from themselves and there friends, and that they judge you a lot!
Almost every time I catch a bus, I hear them bitching or saying rude comments directly to me or my children, I used to just smile breath and put up with it...but no more!

A couple of weeks ago I was on the bus with 'C' in her pram, When 'O' asked if she could sit on her own seat, The bus was empty so I  said sure but if it gets busy you will have to sit on my lap.
She chose her seat and sat lovely and quiet like a big girl.
Five minutes later an old lady had to sit next to me (even though there were tons of empty seats) and give me a lecture about how children are so naughty these days.
I politely listened to her as she told me about how she smacked her children and now smacks her grandchildren and it never did them any harm..(did it do them any good?)
She then said ' You should give that one a good smack, for sitting all the way over there!'
'EXCUSE ME?' I replied...' She asked if she could sit alone, and she is sitting lovely, I see no problem with that. She is none of your concern..But since you think its ok to go around smacking everybody... maybe I should give you a smack for being so rude!

Hmm safe to say she soon moved of my seat! How could I possibly respect a woman like that?

Another thing I have noticed old people never clean up after their dogs!
I have a huge front room window, and see this happen on almost a daily basis.
I used to ignore it but now when I see little dotty plodding along with 5 poodles and letting them mess on and around my garden I am straight out there threatening to report her if she does not clean up...its just rude!

Another few examples of things oldies have said to me.

3 kids and your not even married?!
I bet they all have different dads!
you shouldn't catch the bus, why cant you walk!
oh look another mum living off the council.
why does she have a dummy still!
Whoa did you feel the bus move when she stepped onto it! ( don't you just love them!)

The only old people I respect in my life are the people who have earned the right to be respected.

My granddad who is not with us anymore, who fought for our country, who was an English soldier who married my German Nanna and brought her over to England.
 They were married for 51 years before he passed and he gave her his everything.

My nanna who has been through unimaginable things, she had 13 brothers and sisters and was the only one to survive over the age of 18.
 She had her arm broken by a soldier while fleeing her country, she moved to England, and could not speak a word of English.
 She gave birth in a English hospital (if it can be called that back then) not being able to understand a word they said and was treated horribly.
 But she never complains, she is my everything.
 She is 85 this year.

And my partners gran and gramp, his gran is sadly dying (see last blog).
 But damn has she fought hard!
 This is her 4th cancer now and even though it will kill her, she isn't going to give up easy.
She will be being cheeky until the day she goes and even then I reckon she will cause some havoc up there :)
And his gramp for putting up with the little minx! For being there for her over there 60 years of marriage.

I hope my children, grow up to have as many people In there lifes as I, to respect and look up to.
Without them I would be pretty lost!

Do you get these kind of rude comments?




Tuesday 14 May 2013

Back to the blog! *Update*

Well it's been a long time coming.
My laptop had a sudden death issue, so I have been saving up for a new laptop forever...
but I am  finally here now after selling everything but my soul at the car boot.


Just a quick update to get me started..


I still have a fat arse, my diet is as bad as ever...
But I have been told a few times in the last few weeks that I look 'well' or 'healthy' which is a skinny bitch's polite way of saying 'you don't look quite as fat when your clothes fit right.'

My partner's nan did not have a stroke in the end, she had a severe infection.
But sadly she is loosing her fight with brain tumour number 4.
She is dying, it still has not sank in for any of us to be honest.
She is having fits every day now and is very tired most days, but she always has a smile for any of us.
She is on some strong meds so is currently pain free.
She is in and out of hospital at the minute, but she really is making the best of the worst situation.
Such an inspiration for me.

My little 'O' is still coping brilliantly with her Diabetes.
Another inspiration to me, she never lets it get her down.
We still have good days and bad but that's our life now, we try our best to not let it get in the way of anything.
She starts school in September, and she is so ready for it (I'm not!) but ill do the good mummy thing and put on a brave face.

My not so little 'S' is 6 next month.
Six...when I think about her being six my uterus pangs, yeah...it sucks!
She is growing up to be an amazing little girl, she is kind, helpful, polite.

And 'C' well she is 21 months old now, and finally she is thriving!
She started walking at 16 months, and ever since she has grown into this little mini me... attitude and all.
She has piled on weight and is in 18-24 clothes and a size 3 foot. She is talking and having tantrums (ohhh the tantrums!) let's just say the girl knows her own mind...all the time!

This year so far seems to of flown, we have not seemed to stop at all, and we are in desperate need for a break or a holiday.
But generally we are very happy.

Hope all my readers are well x